Sharing grief with words, music and art
Iona Winter with her book, <em>‘a liminal gathering’</em>. Photo: Fiona Nelson.
Grief is a reflection of a connection that has been lost. At this time of year, the grief we feel for the loss of loved ones is particularly pronounced.
Through her own grief, Iona Winter, a locally-based writer, has recently published ‘a liminal gathering’, an anthology of creative mahi (work) from 103 New Zealand-based artists responding to grief.
It is the first biennial almanac published by Elixir & Star Press.
Iona says it was a whisper in her ear from her deceased son Reuben that drove her on to pursue collecting the grief writings, artworks and music that make up the book.
Reuben Winter was an acclaimed Auckland musician, recording electronica and hip-hop music as Totems since 2012. He was 26 years old when he sadly died through suicide at the time Auckland was in lockdown in 2020.
In 2022, Iona received the CLNZ/NZSA Writers’ Award to write a non-fiction book on suicide bereavement.
“While researching grief in all its complexities, I discovered we are unusual in New Zealand in our lack of a shared, creative outlet for grief,” Iona says,
“Our local books for grieving are mostly self-help guides or psychotherapy texts.”
So, she founded Elixir & Star Press to mend that gap and in memory of Reuben.
“While we can’t all find the words or make images to express our grief, this pukapuka (book) seeks to provide some comfort and acknowledgement to those who are bereft,” she says.
“We all grieve and for many reasons, but we often feel alone when we do.”
Contributors to the anthology are aged between 13 and 80 years old, and for some it is their first publication. Iona says it was difficult choosing from more than 250 submissions.
“My biggest challenge was having to say no to half of them,” she says.
“It was an intuitive process - work that ‘got me’ was included. The range of grief expressed couldn’t be broader – from the loss of parents, siblings, pets, partners and of facing impending death, to loss of identity and grief for nature.”
Through Boosted – New Zealand Arts Foundation crowdfunding platform – Iona was able to have the book printed, hold two book launches and be able to give koha to each artist.
She undertook all the typesetting, layout and editing herself, working on it full time since June. Many of Reuben’s friends and whanau were also involved, curating the playlist to which there is a link in the book.
The book was launched last month in Dunedin and Auckland, and Iona says the feedback has been humbling.
She hopes to hold a launch here in Motueka next year with another two of her books – ‘A Counter of Moons’, the non-fiction book on suicide bereavement, and her fourth book of poetry.
Copies of the book will be available in bookstores and libraries or email [email protected]
“Created as a taonga to be shared during times of grief, I want the book to be passed around, to start a conversation about grief, and show that it is acceptable to talk about it.”